Abi decided that she needed a holiday after her breakup. It was not her choice; in fact, she got dumped. She did try to convince the Dutch guy she saw to give things another try. She had gone to see him at his place in a nearby city about an hour away by train. She was thrilled to see him and had the weekend together for the first time since they have been doing long distance. Abi was starting to fall in love with him. He was exactly her type; tall blond, blue-eyed and fit, plus he had a lovely personality so, she founded herself falling. Abi believed they had a lovely time together; her attraction for him grew even stronger during her visit.

Everything went well from her point of view, they went out to dinner the first night and made hot passionate love many times when they got back, Abi was thrilled and satisfied. They went to see a dance show the following day, and he had made them dinner at home afterwards. Of course, they had sex again, enjoyed breakfast together the next morning, he had even gotten her a present, which surprised Abi but she thought it was charming.

She went over the events of her visit as she tried to understand where things had gone wrong, but nothing stood out to her. “so why the gift if he was not happy with me”? Abi questioned at the time. Even though he did try to reassure her that it was not her fault, that there was nothing wrong with her, except he did not believe they were compatible; she could not help but feel like it was indeed her fault. She was heartbroken. Devastated, so she decided that it was time to go away for a few days. Lick her wounds. Feel alive again.

 A few weeks had passed since the unexpected breakup, Abi had spent most of her free time crying. She spent time looking in the mirror at her petite figure, big beautiful nose, full lips and kinky hair as she mourned her latest failed relationship “why does it always happen to me. What am I doing wrong? Am I not pretty enough?” she asked herself sadly. Abi decided It was time to find herself, embark on her journey of self-discovery. Get out of her comfort zone, go on a solo trip, so, Abi booked some time off the first opportunity she got, and off she went to Portugal. Maybe this will make her happy. She was up for anything. She needed to feel alive and euphoric.

When she arrived in Portugal, Abi immediately loved the place; warm weather, bright blue sky as far as her eyes could see, white gated homes, colorful apartment complexes that made her city in the U.K. looked boring. The hostel Abi booked was a three-star hostel by the beach. It was cheap with basic amenities and had a lot of other guests around Abi’s age, but it was perfect. Her room was small, and it had seven bunk beds, all of them occupied by surfers, backpackers and people doing work -away trips. She settled into the bed next to the veranda, and at night she could hear the waves from the ocean. She was happy. It felt serene, which was just what she needed.  

On the first day, Abi walked around in a tank top, a skirt and flipflops. She bought grocery, met other guests, and became acquainted with a few of them. Later, she went to the beach before calling it a day. Despite having a relaxing day by herself, she wanted more, to feel the excitement the small beach town had to offer. Forget her problems. While in bed that night, she went on the tinder app, had a few matches before falling asleep.

On day two, Abi knew she had to make her trip a lot more exciting. She had to make connections outwith her hostel, she wanted to explore nearby towns and beaches, have fun and so far, it has not been particularly fascinating. Abi had breakfast with other guests in the breakfast room before they left for surfing and Some of them had invited her to join them, but she cannot swim, let alone surf, so she politely declined, besides she had her plans for that evening, with her first date in Portugal.

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Getting there

Abi was a bit disappointed by her date but decided to see it through anyway. His name was Tom. Tom was lean and tall, average looking, pale for someone who lived in a warm country; He later told her he does not tan. Abi’s date came across as boring; he had a very dull voice that gave the impression that he didn’t like talking too much, but Abi decided he was good for one date, she was only looking for an adventure after all. They had met at a small bar not far from Abi’s hostel; talked while sipping drinks and everything was going fine, then Tom asked Abi if she Would like to smoke weed just as they were about to finish their drinks. Abi hesitated briefly trying to decide, she was not a smoker, but she agreed.

She said she would like to on the cliff while they watch the sunset, referring to the place Abi had visited earlier, Tom knew where Abi meant. They headed to his car; Abi was a bit skeptical at first but pushed her doubts aside and got into the vehicle of her date in a strange parking lot. She waited in the car as he got out to meet the dealer. For a moment, it crossed Abi’s mind that he might be a human trafficker, and she wondered if he was meeting his colleague to sell her.

She saw Tom heading towards her a few moments later, he got in, she felt a slight panic when he got into the car empty-handed, Abi held her breath as he reached into his pocket and brought out a bag of weed, She sighed.

The view from the cliff was breath-taking, Abi could see why it was popular amongst tourists.The sunset was spectacular, just like she had imagined. They found a spot close to the edge and settled down. It was a windy warm summer evening. Abi watched the sunset and listened to the sound of the waves crashing onto the rocks below. Everything seemed perfect, and at that moment, even her life seemed perfect. She thought of the sunsets back in her home country, which made her smile. “are you okay” Tom asked Abi as he noticed her smile” yes. I am” she said looking up at the face of the man sat next to her, suddenly wishing she were alone to enjoy the moment uninterrupted.

Tom took the weed and grinned it ready. They continued chatting. Tom told her that he was a regular smoker as he lit the joint and took a long satisfying drag; then added that he was South African and had moved to Portugal with his parents where they had bought their retirement home. He passed it to Abi, she took too long a drag and thought about how stiff and dull the guy was and hoped that the weed would loosen him up a bit. She felt terrible for being judgmental since he was friendly and even appreciated his presence to some degree.

Abi had only tried weed once, a while ago with a close friend in the security of her home, but this time was different. She had convinced herself that it was okay to do it on her holiday. Abi Inhaled and felt a tingling sensation in her head, she coughed a little and inhaled again before handing it over. She felt a little dizzy but did not want to be such a baby, especially not after few drags, so she pretended she felt nothing. They continued smoking, talking as they passed the blunt back and forth until she could barely hear anything Tom was saying. At last, she was high and happy, even if for just a short time.

The blunt was reaching the end of its life when he handed it over to Abi for the last time. She felt immediately woozy after that last drag as the gust hit her face hard as if to wake her up. Abi thought she needed to lay down. She told him she wished to go home, and he said okay with a slight smile that made her suspicious. She wondered why she was so high, and this weed felt different from the last time she smoked, Abi had not felt so stoned back then, which made her paranoid about the marijuana being spiked. She tried to get up but could not, so Tom helped her up. Abi eyes went dark from the sudden movement. She felt her head spinning and realised she was fucked as she tried to gain her balance. As she moved, her dress got stuck on dried twigs, she leaned over to set herself free but started tipping forward to the edge and seemed unable to stop herself. Tom yanked her away from the cliff just in time. “oh my god! You almost fell over” said Tom. He asked Abi if she could walk, Abi nodded but she could barely walk straight as the ground seemed far away, which made her stomp her feet.

Abi struggled to open her eyes even though she was trying hard, words did not make complete sense , and Tom’s face appeared blurry. Tom informed her they were going to her hostel as they walked to his car.

Abi asked Tom to put windows down as he drove, but he refused, instead suggested it was better to have the air conditioner on. His car windows were tinted so she could not see much from looking out the window, he got a call which startled Abi. Most of what he was saying was gibberish to Abi. She looked over at him when heard him laugh for the first time, he was staring at her but not in the cute way as he had done before; the look was mean and demeaning. “yes, I have the bitch” a voice said as Abi tried to keep her eyes open. She looked over at Tom, surprised. “wha what did you say?” Abi stammered,” you should shut the fuck up bitch. I do not want to hear your stupid voice anymore.” Said the sound that resonated like Tom’s. “Let me out. Let me out” screamed Abi as she unsuccessfully tried to open the car door.” don’t be stupid bitch” said Tom this time almost screaming. Abi started crying, looking around for the first time at the desolate, dusty road stretched out in front of her; seemed far from her hostel, the beach, and the town. She did not recognise anything. Abi screamed as she realised what was happening. Tom had kidnapped her.

 She pleaded for him to let her go as she attempted another escape.” why would I do that, dummy?” said Tom’s voice disgustingly. Abi felt her head hit the dashboard, disoriented she squeezed her eyes shut reluctantly; finally, she realised the reality of her situation, and what Tom had done, He spiked her weed; he was a trafficker. Her life was over.

 Abi opened her eyes slowly; she was in a strange bedroom that had a glass door overlooking a massive pool and a golf course. “look who’s awake” said Tom’s voice. Abi winced and held her throbbing head as she struggled to sit up, she touched her forehead and felt a cut. Tom put his book down and got up from his chair to help Abi.” Yes, you hit your head yesterday while I was driving because you did not have your seat belt on” said Tom, we are at my place by the way, and my parents are upstairs, you were too fucked to remember your address, and then you passed out, so I had no choice but to bring you back here he added. “So, you did not kidnap me?” Abi muttered, what about what you said in the car?” Tom looked at Abi and sat next to her and replied” no, I didn’t kidnap you, I tried to get you to tell me your address but kept talking in your sleep in-cohesively, I had to bring you here, carried you from the car. At some point, I became anxious and almost left you on the street, but I had second thoughts.” Tom explained as he handed her a glass of water. “wow. I am so sorry, I should have told you I don’t smoke weed, but I didn’t want to be boring” Abi said embarrassed. “Was I Was I screaming?” she asked as She handed back the glass. “you were talking loudly but you weren’t making, sense, you were having a trip” Tom added.

she realised at that moment how lucky and reckless she had been. She freshened up, spent the day with tom, she let him please her as a way of making it up to him, later he offered to take her back to her hostel. “I am sorry I suggested weed, I just assumed you smoke. It is my fault”. He said. 

“No. I am sorry. I am the worst Tinder date ever.” laughed Abi as they got into Tom’s car. They drove to the hostel, she thanked him and kissed him on the cheek, got out and staggard to her room, she went straight to bed.

The next morning, she saw a message from Tom checking how she was and offered to take her to lunch. Surprised to hear from him at all, she replied and thanked him for taking care of her when he could have done anything while she was vulnerable but politely declined another date. Abi was happy to be safe and alive. She decided there and then that it was worth being careful. She did not need to meet up with random guys for her to have a good time. She was instead going to spend some time alone. Think about her life. Make friends at the hostel, be happy by herself, without meaningless hook-ups but feel euphoric regardless.  

Thanks for reading

Copyright(©)2020 byTiredblackgirl

2 thoughts on “FINDING EUPHORIA

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